A NEURA!

Disclaimer: The next post is written in portuguese, just because... IT WAS A REALLY BAD DAY! I'm not strong enough to say the things I'm feeling in english... Sometimes it happens the other way around... NOT TODAY!

----------------------------------------------

Há dias bons e dias maus... dias melhores e dias piores... há dias assim-assim, dias razoáveis... dias que se toleram, que se aguentam, aos quais se sobrevive...

E depois há aqueles dias em que se acorda com "A NEURA"!!! "A NEURA" é algo do qual não conseguimos fugir... acordamos com ela, e ficamos com ela grudada até ao fim do dia! Não há como evitar, apenas podemos tentar amenizá-la...

Hoje acordei com "A NEURA"!!! Doía-me o corpo... doía-me a cabeça... doía-me o coração... doía-me a alma... doía-me, doía-me, doía-me... Os olhos insistiam em ficar fechados... a cabeça tentava impedir-me de comandar o corpo, impedir-me de me levantar, impedir-me de pegar no carro e ir trabalhar...

Há coisas difíceis de explicar... mas consegui chegar ao escritório... a bastante custo! A desmotivação era por demais evidente... o cansaço também... Como ía eu conseguir trabalhar nestas condições? Afinal de contas, o que tinha acontecido??? Não estava doente... o Sporting até tinha ganho no dia anterior... E UMA GRANDE VITÓRIA! Tudo tinha para acordar bem disposto... e com força de vontade e ânimo para trabalhar... mas afinal... ESTAVA TUDO AO CONTRÁRIO!!! :(

Enfim... depois de muito batalhar, vou tomar o pequeno-almoço (em pleno escritório...)... escolho um bolo, tiro um leite com chocolate... Quando começo a beber o leite... apercebo-me QUE ESTÁ ESTRAGADO!!! Nem queria acreditar... QUE MAIS ESTARIA PARA ACONTECER????

Nada como reunir forças e dirigir-me ao "cliente" (onde decorre o projecto onde estou a trabalhar neste momento...), na esperança de que não poderia piorar!!!
A muito custo lá me esforcei por estar bem disposto!!!

O esforço compensou!!! A verdade foi que melhorei... fui melhorando ao longo do dia!!! Mas a dor de cabeça manteve-se constante... o corpo continuou a doer e a reclamar por um merecido descanso... e o rendimento em declínio constante!!!

O pior já passou... o dia acabou... (infelizmente agora os dias começam e acabam juntamente com o trabalho...) e posso finalmente descansar!!!
Ao olhar para trás para o dia que passou, posso talvez dizer que "A NEURA" foi apenas um dia mau... uma dia muito mau... MAS APENAS E SÓ ISSO!

It's been a long time...

Well, indeed it has been a long time since I wrote in this blog...

The truth is that I have been working a lot (who knew this could actually happen?)... then came vacation... and then came work (hard) again!

3 week vacation was (obviously) short! But it was long enough for a trip around the world! I had the opportunity to go to Australia and New Zealand... and the most amazing thing of all is that the things I remember first from the trip... are the smaller insignificant things, like a sentence I read somewhere and I memorized: "Love doesn't make the world go round, but it makes the ride worthwhile!" - as simple as that!

Hope to have some time latter on to say a few more things about my "around the world" trip, and maybe to post some pictures!

Now off I go, because today is a "short day" at the office (for me, that is!)!

TIME

Time.
What time is it?
Time.
Is it time for dinner?
Time.
Is it time to go home?
Time.
What is time?
Is time what you make of it? Or is it what other people let you make of it?
Do you control your time? Or is it controlled by other people?
Who controls time? I know I don't! I know I'd definitely like to! I know I'll never, though!
And will I manage not to be controlled by time?

No matter what you are doing, but time is always a scarce good! Even if you're having fun (or specially when you're having fun...)!

"Time is the coin of your life. It is the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it will be spent. Be careful lest you let other people spend it for you." - Carl Sandburg

Chaos... again

Today I've been told: "You thrive on chaos!" - didn't I already know that?

Regrets

"Regrets, I've had a few; but then again, too few to mention..." - My Way, performed by Frank Sinatra

I want to talk about regrets...

Should one regret more the things that he did or the things that he didn't do?
Here in Portugal people normally say that it is better to feel regret of something you did than to feel regret of something you didn't do! And usually you get to hear this when you're complaining about something you think you should've done and you didn't!

"Regret for the things we did is something that can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable." - Sidney J. Harris
Well... it looks like it is not only in Portugal! :P

Now... is it really like this?
The truth is, when you don't do something and regret it, you ask yourself: "What if ...? What if ...? What if ...?"
But that can also happen when you do something and regret it: "What if I didn't ...?" And the following reaction should be: "At least I tried..."
And this is what makes all the difference... "At least I tried..."

There's no "right way" to deal with this issue! The truth is that you'll never know if you don't try... Though sometimes you don't need to try to know that you won't get it!
Use with caution!

James Earl Jones a.k.a. Darth Vader

Yesterday I got to thinking about James Earl Jones, after writing the post on the Lion King. The truth is that I think that any sentence that is said with James Earl Jones' dark and strong voice is great. Just remember Lord Vader (a.k.a. Darth Vader) from Star Wars - any sentence that he said was simply amazing!

Darth Vader sentences - some examples (just don't forget to add the deep breathing...):
- "No, I am your father!" (talking to Luke Skywalker...)
- "The Force is with you young Skywalker... But you are not a Jedi yet!" (as he faces Luke Skywalker on a duel for the first time...)
- "I find your lack of faith disturbing..." (not sure when this one is...)
- "If you only new the power of the dark side...!" (again, talking to Luke Skywalker)
- "Impressive, most impressive" (and once again, while fighting Luke)
- "Indeed you are powerful, as the Emperor has foreseen" (again with Luke)
- "What is thy bidding, my master?" (talking to the Emperor)

Any film with James Earl Jones is worth watching, even if just to hear his voice!

The Lion King

Mufasa (King - voice from the great James Earl Jones!) to little Simba:

"Everything the light touches is our kingdom!"

Isn't it nice? ...

I thrive on chaos

Why is it that I only thrive on chaos? Why is it that I need pressure to work? Why is it that it has always been like this? Is it just me, or does this happen to everyone else?

I hate to be put under pressure! I hate chaos! And specially I hate that I only work like this!

Why can't I be productive without the pressure and the chaos?

The truth is that it comes from the start... At school I used to study only when under pressure, which means - THE DAY BEFORE THE EXAM/TEST!
I must say that I used to be a good student, I always did my homework when arriving from school... but study? NOOOOOO!!! I did try to do it... but I was never able to study something if not pressured to do it.

But now things are a little more serious... I have work to do!!! I have to have something to present! I have to show some work done! But the truth is that I only feel productive when under pressure or even worse... ON CHAOS!!! Still... I HATE IT!!!!

Man... I really must do something about this!

Is there anybody out there that can help me???

Good luck to me...

It Starts!!!

Creating a blog is not an easy process! Mainly because you have to decide what to name it! It's as tough a decision as when you have to name your baby (not that I've already done it, but
still...)!

That's how it starts! And my process was definitely not easy...

I wanted a name that would say something about me, but also that would give me enough space to write whatever I felt like writing...

I'll give you some examples of names that occurred to me:

"Whatever you say I am, that's what I'm not" - inspired by the Arctic Monkeys. I liked it a lot, but still, I would feel like going against virtually everybody, and that didn't please me...

"The grass is always greener on the other side..." - inspired on a well known saying and a song by Travis. I also liked it, but then I would be saying that I'm never happy with anything... and that's not true! Let's try something else...

"This is what I've learned so far..." - inspired by the lyrics of a Sarah Bettens song called "Grey". I would feel like a teacher or someone really old talking about past experiences... Not what I was looking for...

"This is my truth, tell me yours" - inspired by the Manic Street Preachers. Also like it, but would be sort of asking for feedback... Not yet, not yet...

"Mad World" - Inspired by a Gary Jules' song, from the OST of Donnie Darko. Lots of good reasons to use this one! But I didn't feel like this was the one... but still, definitely in the Top3!

"Why does it always rain on me?" - again inspired by Travis (and I don't like them all that much...)! Too pessimistic...

"Know thyself" - inspired in the ancient greek. Liked it... but sounded too old... :P

"Present is just the future turning into the past" - don't know where this one came from... Didn't feel like it said anything about me!

And then I thought...
"Where is my mind?" - inspired in a song by Pixies (or in any other version, like the Placebo one, pretty good...). I felt this was the one. So many times I feel out of my mind, out there, somewhere... and I truly ask myself... WHERE IS MY MIND? Well, this says a lot about me, and it also allows me to write anything... whatever comes to my mind! :P JUST PERFECT! ;)

This is the beginning...